New Member- Returned from Banning

[mpeay7]

Hello

Thank you, I accept this. I will continue to pray for this pride to be broken. I will also pray to be humbled as a child, that I may repent.

Matthew 5:3
“Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”

[mpeay7]

Hello everyone, I just wanted you all to know that I know pride is my sin, and it is the root to a multitude of my other wickedness. I am now listening to three sessions. I have started 3 sessions. Inside the sessions, Christopher references other sessions that need to be in the foundation to continue in the sessions. Listening to the youtube sessions is really helpful for me, I usually have my hands full, and listening is very nice.

Thank you very much Christopher for including your biblical understandings on youtube so I can listen to them at work. Otherwise work would be quite boring, and I do enjoy some of the jokes you include and how easy things are to understand when you explain them

I am listening to the sessions
False Converts
Pride
Prayer

I have had an enormous overflowing amount of pride and conceit. Especially conceit. I had/have an abundance of conceit. I really cannot understate how conceited I have been and how much residual conceit still is in my heart. Even though much of my life has been changed (no smoking/drugs/alcohol, goodbye homosexuality, accept Jesus, watch my mouth, etc) Even though much of that has changed, I never ever addressed the conceit, ever. I never addressed it, so like mold that is scraped off a window seal, if it isn't killed, it will grow back again, and again, and again. I cannot have this conceit grow back, or else I will die. It will kill me. And then I will die a second death.  Not that any of you want to know, but my conceit is was 100% evil and I have been joyfully skipping toward hell, with a conceited identity. I was rolling in the satanic muck of the devil and very pleased with myself for doing so. I'm disgusting.

"Yep Lord, I'm all squared away, except don't look at this enormous growing black hole of conceit"

I feel quite hideous even asking Jesus for help, I sound hideous asking for help. I sound hideous to myself. I am grateful that Jesus is very strong and very good, and is strong enough to listen to my hideous pleas if he chooses to. It's ugly..


Thank you all

[mpeay7]

Wow, I finally read Chris' response to me. I didn't read it beforehand, because I have been weeping at work and it isn't appropriate.

It's clear you "Don't Care" anymore.

Sorry to see you "Don't Care" That I am trying, I have given my word not to give up. Actually, I tried to message you a couple of questions to see that you have blocked me. Actually, you seem quite different to me from your teachings. In your teachings, you seem more pitiful to those who are attempting to listen to the truth of the matter. Even though I have dedicated much of my time since discovering your material to understanding it, you "don't care".

In fact, in one video, you "commended" me for listening, as you "commended" anyone who would listen to the video who is not born again. So you don't care and you commend me for listening to your sessions. Alrighty then.
You also say that when it comes to your manner and your condition of pride that you would always self reflect if anyone were to accuse you of an inappropriate manner and/or having a condition of pride.

I've been to this forum, been banned from this forum, have e-mailed Chris an apology, have dedicated many hours to understanding the material and have been told that Chris "Don't Care".

I'm not perfect, I'm not going to be instantly perfect as I gain an understanding. I am a sinner. I accept Christ and I pray to him, I have prayed much, and now since hearing about repentance, I have been praying for that.

Well, Chris just encourages me to go back to Sheila's Ministry. Wow, no thank you Chris.
In one of Chris' youtube videos, he admits there is a learning curve, but Chris on the forum just "Don't Care".

"I don't care about your wild explanations about all the strange and weird things you keep saying. "
Yup, I'm pretty sure that a false convert does have some pretty strange and weird things to say. And I'm pretty sure a false convert does things that are strange and weird, even sins, and lying, and a multitude of other fumbles, mess us, pride, offenses.


Well y'all, I am very, very sorry that I have discouraged you all, and very sorry that I have put you in a place where you "Don't Care" Chris. Please forgive me, I am very grieved. Please. I am praying very much to be brought to repentance, and I am very messed up and broken but I don't want to be a goat on that day. I'm trying. Please forgive me

Chris:
So why are you pushing so desperately to be accepted here? Why not just find somewhere else to go?


Because if I go back to Sheila Zilinsky or anyone else I am going to be in a group of Goats, learning leavened doctrine and going straight to hell. And I want to be here because If I am going to be saved, I will be fellowshipping in heaven with other saved people.

[Timothy]

Wow, I finally read Chris' response to me. I didn't read it beforehand, because I have been weeping at work and it isn't appropriate.

It's clear you "Don't Care" anymore.

Well, let's make it clear why Chris doesn't care about what you are saying anymore, because I also do not care much about what you are saying either. Look at what I just quoted from you.

I didn't read it beforehand, because I have been weeping at work and it isn't appropriate.

For the past week since you have gotten back onto the forum, you have been pushing so hard to give us a certain impression of you that you have sorrow of your sins when all you are doing is putting on a show. That's not going to work with us and, more importantly, it's definitely not going to work with God on judgement day. We do care about your salvation still, but we don't care about the false appearances because that is just based on lies and we don't want fellowship with lies, nor are we going to help you continue to deceive yourself to believe that lie.

2 Corinthians 6:14-15 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?

Remember when I had pointed out to you on the other thread that those that have repentance don't have to keep telling us that they have repented? You're doing the same thing now as you were then when you speak like this:

I have had an enormous overflowing amount of pride and conceit. Especially conceit. I had/have an abundance of conceit. I really cannot understate how conceited I have been and how much residual conceit still is in my heart. Even though much of my life has been changed (no smoking/drugs/alcohol, goodbye homosexuality, accept Jesus, watch my mouth, etc) Even though much of that has changed, I never ever addressed the conceit, ever. I never addressed it, so like mold that is scraped off a window seal, if it isn't killed, it will grow back again, and again, and again. I cannot have this conceit grow back, or else I will die. It will kill me. And then I will die a second death.  Not that any of you want to know, but my conceit is was 100% evil and I have been joyfully skipping toward hell, with a conceited identity. I was rolling in the satanic muck of the devil and very pleased with myself for doing so. I'm disgusting.

"Yep Lord, I'm all squared away, except don't look at this enormous growing black hole of conceit"

I feel quite hideous even asking Jesus for help, I sound hideous asking for help. I sound hideous to myself. I am grateful that Jesus is very strong and very good, and is strong enough to listen to my hideous pleas if he chooses to. It's ugly..

When I had first read this response of yours, I couldn't help but laugh at how absurd it was that you had to repeatedly say that you have conceit. Read what you said out loud to yourself and see what you think it sounds like. What you said in summary is, "I have a lot of pride and conceit, especially conceit, because I'm totally conceited because of all the conceit I have that is 100% evil because of how conceited it is. And I feel hideous and I sound hideous to ask for help and I sound hideous to myself because I'm so hideously hideous." That's ridiculous that you have to do that. The reason you are doing that is not because of humility. It's because you are putting out a false appearance of humility and trying to convince us of having repentance so that we would accept you. When we see a problem like that, we can't just ignore it and make you feel like you're one of us. That would be cruel of us to do to you.

What you are trying to do is make it sound as if we don't care about your well-being or your salvation. That malicious, deceitful tactic is coming from the pride of your heart once again. We can't keep doing this and you're putting us in a situation where we are probably going to ban you again. If we have to constantly point out your sin and nothing changes (and actually, it is getting worse), the best thing we can do is part ways. You need to stop putting on a show and make a choice to leave because we are not entertained.

Chris:
So why are you pushing so desperately to be accepted here? Why not just find somewhere else to go?


Because if I go back to Sheila Zilinsky or anyone else I am going to be in a group of Goats, learning leavened doctrine and going straight to hell. And I want to be here because If I am going to be saved, I will be fellowshipping in heaven with other saved people.

And all we can do, so long as you are here, is give you the law and the gospel and point out your sin until you come to repentance and put your faith in Jesus Christ instead of thinking that putting on a show and being with us is going to get you into heaven. If you don't want to go back to Zilinsky, then you need to trust that God will lead you to repentance instead of us. Like I said, all we can do is point out your sin and give you the gospel. There's nothing else we can do for you, and learning doctrine from us will not do you any good until God gives you repentance. You need to make a choice whether you stay and we have to remove you again because we have to rebuke you for pretty much every post you make, or you depart yourself.

[mpeay7]

Dear Timothy

When I admitted I had a pride problem, that was me confessing that I did have a pride problem. I confessed that I did have a conceit problem. I'm not sure what makes that laughable, when we are asked to confess... Right?

James 5:16
Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

I just want to go really slow in my responses with you because I really honestly am trying to understand...

Is the confessing of faults only for bretheren? I hope you can see my intentions

McKenna

[Timothy]

When I admitted I had a pride problem, that was me confessing that I did have a pride problem. I confessed that I did have a conceit problem. I'm not sure what makes that laughable, when we are asked to confess... Right?

James 5:16
Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

I just want to go really slow in my responses with you because I really honestly am trying to understand...

Is the confessing of faults only for bretheren? I hope you can see my intentions

And what you just said is another problem. You don't directly address what we are saying to you. We can't have a productive conversation if that is all you are going to do and nothing will ever get resolved.

I laughed because of the absurdity of how you repeatedly said that you are "conceited." When you do things like that, it's because you are trying to push a false appearance of humility and I could clearly see that. That is what I'm addressing and that is point you are ignoring. I never said that telling us your sin is wrong. What I said is the false appearance of humility is a lie. The very fact that you "confessed" to us is because you are desperately trying to convince us of something that is false and your "confession" becomes sin at that point.

I wouldn't mind it if you came to us in true repentance of your sin and that hasn't happened yet. But if you ever do repent, it should be to God first because He is the one you have to answer to at judgment.

[mpeay7]

Hi Timothy,
Thank you for your reply

So, the number of times I used the word conceited shows you that my humility is a lie?
Is repentance always with bawling? And it comes suddenly from God/ I am brought to repentance by God?


McKenna

[Ellie]

The point is that you were clearly trying to put on a show of humility when you really still have no repentance. Nobody responded to you when you did that because it was evident to all of us who have understanding by the Holy Spirit, that you were not saying those things with the contrite spirit spoken of in the scriptures.

Repentance is given by God and here is some scripture that shows it:

In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth; -2 Timothy 2:25

When they heard these things, they held their peace, and glorified God, saying, Then hath God also to the Gentiles granted repentance unto life. - Acts 11:18

Is repentance always with bawling?

My answer to this isn't going to be what you want to hear, but what I have already told you. Those who have come to repentance know it with certainty once they understand the doctrine.

[mpeay7]

Hello

Thank you Ellie and Timothy
I am going to keep on praying, and listening to the bible. I will also keep learning from the sessions, and I am going to re-listen to the session on repentance.
Could I also ask if you could also pray for me please?

Thank you

McKenna

[Jeanne]

McKenna, I don't believe anyone has stopped praying for you. But the bottom line is, whether we accept you as brethren or not makes no difference, because GOD is the one you need to worry about. Chris can't save you, and neither can any of the rest of us. Even if no one here had the discernment to see what you were doing, and we just welcomed you into our fellowship with open arms, it would do you absolutely no good at all because

John 16:15 And he said unto them, Ye are they which justify yourselves before men; but God knoweth your hearts: for that which is highly esteemed among men is abomination in the sight of God.

When you start worrying more about what God thinks of you than what we think, that would be a huge step in the right direction.

[mpeay7]

Hello

Thank you Jeanne, Ellie, Timothy, and Chris

I'm sorry I keep trying to reject you and reject what you say. I know that the teachings of the Holy Spirit are true and are undeniable. I am struggling with my pride and keep trying to reject you. I know that you are all concerned about my soul, and I am too. I am surprised to find out I am a false convert, and I have had to go back to square one. I was a very confident false convert.
I know for sure that the teachings are of God, and I also know for sure that I have a lot to clean out, and also a lot to be grateful for.
I am very fearful that I will be a goat on that day.

Hope you're all having a very peaceful day
McKenna


Matthew 13

49So shall it be at the end of the world: the angels shall come forth, and sever the wicked from among the just,

50And shall cast them into the furnace of fire: there shall be wailing and gnashing of teeth.